Are you a health freak?

Are you a health freak?
If you answered yes to any of these questions.  You should not a have children or force them to eat the same things you do.

Are you allergic to pretty much everything?
Do you not let your kids drink soda no matter what?
Are certain foods 'free' of anything?
If you do drink soda, is the only soda you buy 'diet'?
Are you American?
Are you worried about your children's health before they were ever born, let alone know what's good and bad for them?
Do you force your child to eat the things they love without the things they love?
Are you constantly looking at new diets?
Is everything you hate bad for you?
Do you want to live to be 100?
Are you vegetarian? (Hitler was a vegetarian)

If you answered yes to any of these questions, save your children the turmoil of having to live with your stupid, self-conscious ass and don't have children.  You're a disgusting, disgrace of an American.  We wouldn't be the kind of consumerist, capitalists we are today with our nearly unlimited amount of food if the dumbasses like you are running it.  Remember, every time a morbidly obese person goes on a diet, thousands of snack cakes factory workers are laid off.  Don't let these poor families go hungry.  Get fat my fellow Americans.  It's how you're supposed to be.  Fat.  I love fat people.  Where would our great world be without fat people.  I mean, so many famous TV stars are fat.  Rodney Dangerfield, Homer Simpson, Peter Griffin, Sam Kinison, John Pinette, Gabriel Iglesias, Danny DeVito, and Alec Baldwin.  Maybe you could join these wonderful jolly people.